why I haven't been blogging much. I don't feel like I have very much to say. Surprisingly enough, I have been relatively mellow lately. I haven't gotten worked up over politics or stupid people or the fact that Kansas resembles a ring of hell complete with dead, brown grass and temperatures that make crying about them pretty pointless as the tears evaporate as soon as they are squeezed from the tear ducts. Although I am a little put out by the fact that I currently have no running water - it seems that Tonganoxie has been having a hard time keeping the water pipes together lately.
I did want to mention, though, that today marks Aaron's and my 13 year anniversary. If I weren't feeling so lazy, I would scan a nice wedding photo. We had the best wedding and reception ever (and I am TOTALLY unbiased). Aaron is still a wonderful husband, father, provider and garbage taker-outer. He puts up with a lot of craziness from me, and I am so happy that 13 years later, he hasn't run screaming into the night. Well, except for that one time. But he came back.
Anyway, Bryn tells me we have running water again. Time to go flush the toilets and rinse the breakfast dishes.
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Hello Again!
It has come to my attention that there are actually a few people who stop in here to read and they have wondered where I have gone (thank you all 3 of you loyal readers!). The problem when I stay away so long is the need I feel to recap all of the events I have missed blogging about. So here it goes...
We muddled through the spring and early summer. Here are some of the highlights...
- We celebrated the kids birthdays (10 and 4 - wow)
- Bryn finished 4th grade
- Grant had his last day of Parent's Day Out (onto preschool next year)
- Bryn and I took a Spring Break trip to St. Louis on the train with Riley and Victoria
- The Hunger Games move finally came out
- Bryn played soccer and took a theater class at the Arts Center
- Grant played blastball (a fast paced and kind of hilarious form of t-ball)
- I went to Vegas with Krista and got a tattoo (OK...it was only a temporary one. I still can't commit to a real one)
- I finished my tenure as Library Board president - yippee! Now I am treasurer...
- All of us visited Idaho and I went to Brave Girls Camp (more on that later, most likely)
- I survived another year of VBS. Probably more importantly, all of the kids survived another year of me at VBS
- All of the grandparents came for a visit (not all at the same time, although even that might work as they are all pretty well behaved!)
- We took a family canoe trip with friends
- Bryn went to Animal Camp for a week
- Aaron and I went on an adult canoe trip with friends and laughed our asses off all weekend. Actually, we laughed a lot but none of my ass disappeared in the process, unfortunately.
- I bought a guitar that I have no idea how to play.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Nap, interrupted
Despite the fact that their are some bigger, more unpleasant things I could be complaining about, I decided to hone in on something that is really just a slight blip on the radar.
My nap (which I had high hopes for as a cure for this nagging cold and cough I have acquired) was interrupted today by a phone call from a local man who seems to be quite convinced I am trying to steal his identity and rob him blind. Evidently not satisfied by the fact that I have already talked to the bank 3 times, his wife 3 times, two different vendors AND had money immediately transferred from my account to his as soon as I was made aware of the problem, he had to call just to throw in some condescension and unasked for advice on personal banking matters. Awesome.
Now in all fairness, the man involved in this bank issue has reasonable evidence to suggest that I am indeed trying to use his debit card number. Since he does not know me, he obviously cannot know what a lovely and honest human being I am (no laughing, please. It is my blog and I have a right to my delusions). But trust me when I say that if I did ever decide to go into a life of crime, I am going to take off with A LOT more than $26 and some change. And I probably am not going to call you back and straighten things out in less than 15 minutes of being notified there is an issue. All of that aside, I understand you being upset that there is a problem. But once it has been resolved, please LEAVE ME ALONE! Phone calls to my home to say things like "do you not look at your card when you type the number when you order things online?" and "I know you have already taken care of this, but I thought *I* might just need to get involved" are not only annoying, but kind of offensive.
I know there are bigger things to worry about...Death, cancer, rocky relationships, the fact that Grant's teacher just called to tell me there is a case of head lice in his class. But complaining about a small blip makes me feel better. Now I am off to wash some bedding and check noggins for parasites.
My nap (which I had high hopes for as a cure for this nagging cold and cough I have acquired) was interrupted today by a phone call from a local man who seems to be quite convinced I am trying to steal his identity and rob him blind. Evidently not satisfied by the fact that I have already talked to the bank 3 times, his wife 3 times, two different vendors AND had money immediately transferred from my account to his as soon as I was made aware of the problem, he had to call just to throw in some condescension and unasked for advice on personal banking matters. Awesome.
Now in all fairness, the man involved in this bank issue has reasonable evidence to suggest that I am indeed trying to use his debit card number. Since he does not know me, he obviously cannot know what a lovely and honest human being I am (no laughing, please. It is my blog and I have a right to my delusions). But trust me when I say that if I did ever decide to go into a life of crime, I am going to take off with A LOT more than $26 and some change. And I probably am not going to call you back and straighten things out in less than 15 minutes of being notified there is an issue. All of that aside, I understand you being upset that there is a problem. But once it has been resolved, please LEAVE ME ALONE! Phone calls to my home to say things like "do you not look at your card when you type the number when you order things online?" and "I know you have already taken care of this, but I thought *I* might just need to get involved" are not only annoying, but kind of offensive.
I know there are bigger things to worry about...Death, cancer, rocky relationships, the fact that Grant's teacher just called to tell me there is a case of head lice in his class. But complaining about a small blip makes me feel better. Now I am off to wash some bedding and check noggins for parasites.
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Goodbye, Grandpa
When you make it to 38 years old with all of your genetically related grandparents still living, you begin to think that maybe they are going get the better of this death thing after all. But as was stated at a funeral I recently attended, death is coming for us all. Whether or not we want to admit it, and no matter how uncomfortable it is to talk about or think about, we are all going to end up there. Yesterday, after 92 years of living, death came for my grandpa, George "Ray" Hudson.
The child in me remembers my grandpa as the guy who rolled around on the floor and played horsey with the grandkids. He shucked endless ears of corn with us for family reunions, kicked the ball around the yard with us and taught us to draw (unfortunately, I never caught on despite the fact he was a talented artist). He took us to big buildings where we sat in big chairs and he taught us about politician-y things. He sent us to bed when it was time for the adults to have a beverage and talk about adult things. Many hours were spent whispering in rooms of that house in Hinsdale while the adults downstairs solved the world's problems.
The teenager in me remembers a generous man who had many opinions, many friends and was very active. He willingly went to dinner theaters and countless musicals when I went to visit. He loved to talk to people and always had a smile and a kind word for anyone he met. He went out for a daily walk and had a nightly drink. His driving was scary as hell and the late night lectures from he and my grandma regarding proper dating behavior were exasperating and out-dated. Dinner conversation had to include current events and the latest political developments and the nights often ended with a viewing of one of the many old movies out of the video collection.
The adult in me remembers my grandpa as a passionate politician (a little too conservative for my taste, but passionate nonetheless), a devoted Christian, a loving family man and a caring husband. As time claimed many of his physical abilities and most of his mind, he retained two things...his love for his wife and his sense of humor. He always knew where my grandma was sitting and never failed to recognize her voice, even when I don't think he knew who anyone else was, he knew my grandma. During my last visit there, we were talking about the ability to catnap. My dad mentioned that my grandpa was always able to catch some zzzzzzzzz's no matter where he was. A couple of minutes later, I looked over at my grandpa who was breathing heavily and unevenly (not a comforting thing to see). When I asked if he he was OK, he informed me he was trying to fake snore so he could pretend he was taking a catnap. He said he obviously needed some more practice.
My grandpa was guided by a very strong sense of right and wrong. I am betting that he, like everyone else I know, wished for a couple of "do-overs". But I think any of the decisions he made that may not have turned out the way he had hoped were a result of doing what he thought was right using the information he had at the time. What more can you ask for from a person, really?
My grandpa loved to sing- I can't hear Edelweiss without hearing his voice in my mind. He didn't like people going without shoes and more than once reprimanded me for being barefoot. He loved to take pictures and filled countless albums with pictures of he and my grandmas vacations. It would have been helpful if digital cameras came about a bit sooner...no offense, Grandpa, but I don't think we will keep ALL of the sheep, cow and countryside pictures.
A speaker at the same recently attended funeral talked about "home"- that place that stirs that feeling in your heart when your eyes light on it after being away. I get that feeling when I cross over the Mississippi River bridge and head toward the Memphis skyline. I don't know the physical place that gave my grandpa that feeling. I never asked. But I know he had that feeling yesterday when he laid his eyes on heaven. Rest in peace, Grandpa. I know that the angels were there to welcome you home.
The child in me remembers my grandpa as the guy who rolled around on the floor and played horsey with the grandkids. He shucked endless ears of corn with us for family reunions, kicked the ball around the yard with us and taught us to draw (unfortunately, I never caught on despite the fact he was a talented artist). He took us to big buildings where we sat in big chairs and he taught us about politician-y things. He sent us to bed when it was time for the adults to have a beverage and talk about adult things. Many hours were spent whispering in rooms of that house in Hinsdale while the adults downstairs solved the world's problems.
The teenager in me remembers a generous man who had many opinions, many friends and was very active. He willingly went to dinner theaters and countless musicals when I went to visit. He loved to talk to people and always had a smile and a kind word for anyone he met. He went out for a daily walk and had a nightly drink. His driving was scary as hell and the late night lectures from he and my grandma regarding proper dating behavior were exasperating and out-dated. Dinner conversation had to include current events and the latest political developments and the nights often ended with a viewing of one of the many old movies out of the video collection.
The adult in me remembers my grandpa as a passionate politician (a little too conservative for my taste, but passionate nonetheless), a devoted Christian, a loving family man and a caring husband. As time claimed many of his physical abilities and most of his mind, he retained two things...his love for his wife and his sense of humor. He always knew where my grandma was sitting and never failed to recognize her voice, even when I don't think he knew who anyone else was, he knew my grandma. During my last visit there, we were talking about the ability to catnap. My dad mentioned that my grandpa was always able to catch some zzzzzzzzz's no matter where he was. A couple of minutes later, I looked over at my grandpa who was breathing heavily and unevenly (not a comforting thing to see). When I asked if he he was OK, he informed me he was trying to fake snore so he could pretend he was taking a catnap. He said he obviously needed some more practice.
My grandpa was guided by a very strong sense of right and wrong. I am betting that he, like everyone else I know, wished for a couple of "do-overs". But I think any of the decisions he made that may not have turned out the way he had hoped were a result of doing what he thought was right using the information he had at the time. What more can you ask for from a person, really?
My grandpa loved to sing- I can't hear Edelweiss without hearing his voice in my mind. He didn't like people going without shoes and more than once reprimanded me for being barefoot. He loved to take pictures and filled countless albums with pictures of he and my grandmas vacations. It would have been helpful if digital cameras came about a bit sooner...no offense, Grandpa, but I don't think we will keep ALL of the sheep, cow and countryside pictures.
A speaker at the same recently attended funeral talked about "home"- that place that stirs that feeling in your heart when your eyes light on it after being away. I get that feeling when I cross over the Mississippi River bridge and head toward the Memphis skyline. I don't know the physical place that gave my grandpa that feeling. I never asked. But I know he had that feeling yesterday when he laid his eyes on heaven. Rest in peace, Grandpa. I know that the angels were there to welcome you home.
Monday, February 6, 2012
Of lice and nuns
Kind of like mice and men, no?
It is well past time for a blog update, but I just haven't had much to say. Actually, that is not true...I just haven't had much to say in public. Because despite the fact that I started this blog as my journal, ready to throw it all out here, there are still a few things I keep private. Shocking for those of you who know me in real life, I know...I tend to not keep much to myself. The long and the short of it is that I am still struggling with tidying up my relationship world and just can't seem to quite get there. There are some relationships I have held on to that I need to let go and some relationships that I have let slide that I need to hold on to. When I get it sorted out, I will be sure to post. Actually, I probably won't have to - my screams of joy and accomplishment will be heard the world over.
Anyway, back to lice and nuns...
A few weeks ago, we had our first encounter with head lice at the Reed house and if I never experience that again, it will be too soon. Bryn acquired the creepy crawlies somewhere, was duly mortified and is now lice free (knock on wood). I have learned more about the life cycle of lice than I wanted to know, exactly how hard it is to remove nits from hair and that Tonganoxie Elementary School is completely non-sensical when it comes to keeping the school lice free. On the bright side, I figure I am now a valuable community resource as I have become somewhat of a lice expert.
In January, I went on a "nun retreat" in Atchison, Kansas with a friend and had a fabulous time. I had some time for reflection, got to eat in a nun cafeteria, bonded with my friend, stayed in a cool Victorian house and got to experience Benedictine prayers (they sing. I did not know this). Said friend and I have already signed up for nun retreat, Round 2 in September...needless to say, it was relaxing and refreshing.
I also has a fabulous trip to Memphis with my friend Lisa. We were there for the funeral of Lisa's childhood friend's parents, but it was the most fun funeral trip I have ever had! I finally went to Graceland, ate some good food, saw friends and family, met some neat people and got to spend 16 hours in the car bonding with Lisa.
Christmas was great...nice and relaxing with Aaron's parents and brother at our house. Although I have a tough time staying still, it was really nice to have a slower paced holiday. Of course the kids were spoiled rotten, I got more presents than I needed and I ate too much. I love holidays.
I just got back from a trip to Chicago. I met dad there and we stayed with my grandparents and it was as nice a trip as I have had there in years. My Grandpa was more talkative and engaged than I have seen him in eons and my Grandma seemed to be feeling pretty good. She was playing Scrabble on her iPad when I left. I am thankful for the time with them and with my Dad - it was a truly lovely trip.
There are, of course, a million other little things both good and bad going on, but those are some of the highlights. Now back to work...it's a new semester and the grading is piling up.
It is well past time for a blog update, but I just haven't had much to say. Actually, that is not true...I just haven't had much to say in public. Because despite the fact that I started this blog as my journal, ready to throw it all out here, there are still a few things I keep private. Shocking for those of you who know me in real life, I know...I tend to not keep much to myself. The long and the short of it is that I am still struggling with tidying up my relationship world and just can't seem to quite get there. There are some relationships I have held on to that I need to let go and some relationships that I have let slide that I need to hold on to. When I get it sorted out, I will be sure to post. Actually, I probably won't have to - my screams of joy and accomplishment will be heard the world over.
Anyway, back to lice and nuns...
A few weeks ago, we had our first encounter with head lice at the Reed house and if I never experience that again, it will be too soon. Bryn acquired the creepy crawlies somewhere, was duly mortified and is now lice free (knock on wood). I have learned more about the life cycle of lice than I wanted to know, exactly how hard it is to remove nits from hair and that Tonganoxie Elementary School is completely non-sensical when it comes to keeping the school lice free. On the bright side, I figure I am now a valuable community resource as I have become somewhat of a lice expert.
In January, I went on a "nun retreat" in Atchison, Kansas with a friend and had a fabulous time. I had some time for reflection, got to eat in a nun cafeteria, bonded with my friend, stayed in a cool Victorian house and got to experience Benedictine prayers (they sing. I did not know this). Said friend and I have already signed up for nun retreat, Round 2 in September...needless to say, it was relaxing and refreshing.
I also has a fabulous trip to Memphis with my friend Lisa. We were there for the funeral of Lisa's childhood friend's parents, but it was the most fun funeral trip I have ever had! I finally went to Graceland, ate some good food, saw friends and family, met some neat people and got to spend 16 hours in the car bonding with Lisa.
Christmas was great...nice and relaxing with Aaron's parents and brother at our house. Although I have a tough time staying still, it was really nice to have a slower paced holiday. Of course the kids were spoiled rotten, I got more presents than I needed and I ate too much. I love holidays.
I just got back from a trip to Chicago. I met dad there and we stayed with my grandparents and it was as nice a trip as I have had there in years. My Grandpa was more talkative and engaged than I have seen him in eons and my Grandma seemed to be feeling pretty good. She was playing Scrabble on her iPad when I left. I am thankful for the time with them and with my Dad - it was a truly lovely trip.
There are, of course, a million other little things both good and bad going on, but those are some of the highlights. Now back to work...it's a new semester and the grading is piling up.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
My life with diabetes: a year later
It has been exactly one year since my official diabetes diagnosis. It has been quite a trip. And not the all-expenses-paid, room-with a view, drinks-are-included kind of trip. It has been fraught with highs and lows and learning lots of information I didn't really want to have a need to know.
One year ago I felt horribly sick (and was horribly sick), was having paralyzing anxiety attacks and wasn't sure I would be around today to be blogging at all. I felt that bad.
But here I am.
I am thankful for that EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
My diagnosis has put me in very real touch with my mortality. The statistics are depressing. I am 2 to 4 times more likely to die of heart disease than someone without diabetes. I am 2 to 4 times more likely to have a stroke. 60-70% of people with diabetes have some type of nervous system damage. My risk of dying of kidney disease is tripled, my risk of liver cancer is doubled and my statistical chances of having Alzheimer's, COPD, blindness, digestive problems, dental problems and limb amputation are higher than in my non-diabetic peers. Diabetes will easily shave 5-10 years off of my life - if I am fortunate enough to not develop any of the above problems before then.
Awesome. Not exactly the kind of information that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.
Most of the time I work really hard to not become one of the above statistics. Most days I do pretty well - I make good choices and keep myself pretty healthy. There is some good news for me 365 days after my diagnosis. Even though I am still far from an ideal weight, I have evicted 50 pounds from my body (although pounds 48, 49 and 50 are kind of like boomerang children - they keep coming back when I send them out into the world). I have gone from having high blood pressure, triglycerides, cholesterol, liver enzymes and blood sugars to being in the normal range for all of them (except my HDL which still runs a little low despite plenty of red wine and fish oil). Based on my current blood work, you would have no clue I have diabetes. I am off of my diabetes medication and still maintain decent blood sugar levels (most days) and I even exercise once in a blue moon. I have met some cool people through various diabetes activities and forums and I feel A LOT better than I did a year ago.
But despite the positives, the reality is that having diabetes really sucks. I realize it could be worse. I could have complications. I could have the added pressure of dealing with a continuous glucose monitor, insulin injections and hypoglycemic episodes. I could have family and friends that aren't supportive of me. I could have bad doctors and/or no access to the information I need to keep myself as healthy as possible. I could have bad lab results despite a real effort to keep my numbers under control.
But it still sucks.
I don't put a single thing in my mouth without thinking about how it will affect my blood sugar (I admit it doesn't always stop me from making bad choices, but I still think about it). I seem to have a very low tolerance for carbohydrates. Without a highly functioning pancreas or the benefit of insulin injections I can't enjoy foods that should be relatively guilt free (think nice juicy apples, fruit salad, low-fat yogurt, carrots, a warm piece of freshly baked whole grain bread) much less Girl Scout cookies, a loaded baked potato, a piece of apple pie or a serving of lasagna with breadsticks without seeing a blood sugar number that is too high. Okay...in all fairness, I can drink water and eat broccoli - and I actually like broccoli - without guilt or deleterious effects, but really!?!?! Broccoli!?!?!
I have a whole new level of guilt when I can't get my butt up to exercise or I don't feel like tacking that extra few minutes onto my treadmill time. I can work myself into a tizzy if I think about not having the opportunity to see my kids grow up or be around when my husband retires someday (I mean who else will make him long for the working days if I am not around to drive him crazy?). It is difficult to eat out and no fun to fix two meals to accommodate my and my family's dietary needs. It is tiring to explain to others why and what I should be eating and I get cranky when I have to avoid most things on a table full of yummy food when I am a guest at other people's houses.
And it really is hard for me to go it (virtually) alone. Not many of the people in my close circle of family and friends have to deal with diabetes (fortunately) and therefore aren't bogged down in the details. Nor should they be. But as a person who likes to discuss, re-discuss and discuss things again, it is hard to have only a virtual sounding board in the form of online forums.
So where does this leave me a year later?
A year older. A year wiser. A year healthier. And 365 times more thankful for my life than I was a year ago.
But, damn...diabetes still sucks.
One year ago I felt horribly sick (and was horribly sick), was having paralyzing anxiety attacks and wasn't sure I would be around today to be blogging at all. I felt that bad.
But here I am.
I am thankful for that EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
My diagnosis has put me in very real touch with my mortality. The statistics are depressing. I am 2 to 4 times more likely to die of heart disease than someone without diabetes. I am 2 to 4 times more likely to have a stroke. 60-70% of people with diabetes have some type of nervous system damage. My risk of dying of kidney disease is tripled, my risk of liver cancer is doubled and my statistical chances of having Alzheimer's, COPD, blindness, digestive problems, dental problems and limb amputation are higher than in my non-diabetic peers. Diabetes will easily shave 5-10 years off of my life - if I am fortunate enough to not develop any of the above problems before then.
Awesome. Not exactly the kind of information that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.
Most of the time I work really hard to not become one of the above statistics. Most days I do pretty well - I make good choices and keep myself pretty healthy. There is some good news for me 365 days after my diagnosis. Even though I am still far from an ideal weight, I have evicted 50 pounds from my body (although pounds 48, 49 and 50 are kind of like boomerang children - they keep coming back when I send them out into the world). I have gone from having high blood pressure, triglycerides, cholesterol, liver enzymes and blood sugars to being in the normal range for all of them (except my HDL which still runs a little low despite plenty of red wine and fish oil). Based on my current blood work, you would have no clue I have diabetes. I am off of my diabetes medication and still maintain decent blood sugar levels (most days) and I even exercise once in a blue moon. I have met some cool people through various diabetes activities and forums and I feel A LOT better than I did a year ago.
But despite the positives, the reality is that having diabetes really sucks. I realize it could be worse. I could have complications. I could have the added pressure of dealing with a continuous glucose monitor, insulin injections and hypoglycemic episodes. I could have family and friends that aren't supportive of me. I could have bad doctors and/or no access to the information I need to keep myself as healthy as possible. I could have bad lab results despite a real effort to keep my numbers under control.
But it still sucks.
I don't put a single thing in my mouth without thinking about how it will affect my blood sugar (I admit it doesn't always stop me from making bad choices, but I still think about it). I seem to have a very low tolerance for carbohydrates. Without a highly functioning pancreas or the benefit of insulin injections I can't enjoy foods that should be relatively guilt free (think nice juicy apples, fruit salad, low-fat yogurt, carrots, a warm piece of freshly baked whole grain bread) much less Girl Scout cookies, a loaded baked potato, a piece of apple pie or a serving of lasagna with breadsticks without seeing a blood sugar number that is too high. Okay...in all fairness, I can drink water and eat broccoli - and I actually like broccoli - without guilt or deleterious effects, but really!?!?! Broccoli!?!?!
I have a whole new level of guilt when I can't get my butt up to exercise or I don't feel like tacking that extra few minutes onto my treadmill time. I can work myself into a tizzy if I think about not having the opportunity to see my kids grow up or be around when my husband retires someday (I mean who else will make him long for the working days if I am not around to drive him crazy?). It is difficult to eat out and no fun to fix two meals to accommodate my and my family's dietary needs. It is tiring to explain to others why and what I should be eating and I get cranky when I have to avoid most things on a table full of yummy food when I am a guest at other people's houses.
And it really is hard for me to go it (virtually) alone. Not many of the people in my close circle of family and friends have to deal with diabetes (fortunately) and therefore aren't bogged down in the details. Nor should they be. But as a person who likes to discuss, re-discuss and discuss things again, it is hard to have only a virtual sounding board in the form of online forums.
So where does this leave me a year later?
A year older. A year wiser. A year healthier. And 365 times more thankful for my life than I was a year ago.
But, damn...diabetes still sucks.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Why do I waste brain power on these things?
The Duggar family of TLC's 19 Kids and Counting fame will soon be 20 Kids and Counting. This piece of news (which personally affects no one I know yet has taken up considerable Facebook conversation time for a lot of people I do personally know) has made me wonder why in the hell I care and why it make me a little crazy that Michelle Duggar is going to pop out kid number 20?
It isn't the fact the the Duggars are "whoring" (not my word here. I borrowed) out their kids to make some money on TV. I actually don't have an issue with that. I mean, the kids may be slightly embarrassed by some of their childhood antics as they grow older and you could blame that on the parents, I suppose. But seriously, how many parents don't threaten to show their kid's future spouses embarrassing photos of their childhood? Do these kids have to put up with people in their homes and perform for the cameras and wake up early to shoot "reality"? Yeah, but I don't call that abuse. Inconvenient, maybe, but not abusive in my book. In fact, I am pretty sure the paycheck has provided some nice things for that family and I know there are parents who do far worse things to make a buck to raise their families.
It isn't the fact that they use a whole lot of stuff. I mean, they are Americans, after all, and all of us Americans use far more than our share of the world's natural resources. Think mud hut in Africa if you aren't following me on this one. Just the fact that we use any kind of motorized transportation or electricity of any kind pretty much throws us into the "more than our fair share" category.
It isn't the fact that the older kids have lots of responsibility for the younger ones. Which, let's face it, they do. One mom and dad cannot possibly be there to wipe every tear and doctor every scrape and brush every tooth when there are that many kids in the house. But that is OK with me, too. They all seem to treat each other pretty well. Maybe it isn't "fair"that the older kids are essentially "mom", but we all screw our kids up in one way or another. I figure they can spend their adult lives doing whatever they want. And if the worst thing that happens to them is that they have to care for their younger siblings, they are doing pretty well, really. If you don't believe me, let me tell you a story about a kid who has a hard time opening her eyes all the way due to undeveloped muscles in her eyelids from being kept in the corner of a dark trailer for the first year of life.
I actually do understand all of the above arguments and don't disagree with those who stand on them. But none of those reasons speak to me. But I think I know the one that does.
Michelle is not a young woman. Difficulties associated with pregnancy and childbirth do not decrease as one gets older. The last Duggar pregnancy was fraught with complications and resulted in the birth of a micro-preemie. Mom and baby both survived and are doing well, but it was touch-and-go for quite a while. Does this mean she doesn't have a right to have more kids? No. I had a preemie and a complicated pregnancy and chose to have another child . AFTER consulting with multiple health professionals. Do I know that Michelle hasn't gotten the go ahead from her doctor and been told there is a 0% chance that she will have another complicated pregnancy? No, I don't know that for sure. But I do know that I wouldn't bet the farm on the odds of that happening.
Now to the real issue for me...Michelle and her husband have both said publicly that they will have as many kids "as God sees fit" and that if she keeps getting pregnant, it is God's will.
Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Back up the hockey-team-converted-to-Duggar-family-transport-vehicle bus. If God lets you get pregnant again it is his will to risk your own life and the life of a child and possibly leave your other 19 children motherless? Isn't that kind of like the people who choose not to treat their children for cancer because if it is God's will for them to live, they will live without medical intervention? I may have missed the boat, but it seems to me there was something in that there Bible about free will and choosing to go down one path or the other. Last time I checked, the ability or desire to do something didn't necessarily make it a slam dunk in the what-would-Jesus-do "right" game.
So is it God's will for the Duggars to have 20 kids? Maybe. I missed the memo directly from God on that subject evidently. But the memo I did see (in the form of the most printed book of all time) is that as humans we are given free will and are indeed fallible. We don't always choose the right path, even when we think we are doing God's will. We are sinful. We are broken. We are selfish.
I can't help but wonder if maybe Michelle and Jim Bob aren't just a little swayed by what THEY desire rather than determining what it is that GOD desires. Do I have any clue (much less hard evidence) what it is that God desires for the Duggars as far as their family size goes? Ummmmm, no. But I am pretty sure no one else does either. Maybe they are just a little bit selfish - kind of like the rest of us mere mortals. And doesn't that leave open the possibility that they are making ill-informed decisions and then justifying them in a way that is hard to argue with (i.e. God's will) since no one knows that for sure?
Of course I don't know any of this for sure. But, as always, I have an opinion. That I am definitely not afraid to share. After all, if I can share it, it must be God's will that I blog about it all I want to, right? Argue with that one, people.
It isn't the fact the the Duggars are "whoring" (not my word here. I borrowed) out their kids to make some money on TV. I actually don't have an issue with that. I mean, the kids may be slightly embarrassed by some of their childhood antics as they grow older and you could blame that on the parents, I suppose. But seriously, how many parents don't threaten to show their kid's future spouses embarrassing photos of their childhood? Do these kids have to put up with people in their homes and perform for the cameras and wake up early to shoot "reality"? Yeah, but I don't call that abuse. Inconvenient, maybe, but not abusive in my book. In fact, I am pretty sure the paycheck has provided some nice things for that family and I know there are parents who do far worse things to make a buck to raise their families.
It isn't the fact that they use a whole lot of stuff. I mean, they are Americans, after all, and all of us Americans use far more than our share of the world's natural resources. Think mud hut in Africa if you aren't following me on this one. Just the fact that we use any kind of motorized transportation or electricity of any kind pretty much throws us into the "more than our fair share" category.
It isn't the fact that the older kids have lots of responsibility for the younger ones. Which, let's face it, they do. One mom and dad cannot possibly be there to wipe every tear and doctor every scrape and brush every tooth when there are that many kids in the house. But that is OK with me, too. They all seem to treat each other pretty well. Maybe it isn't "fair"that the older kids are essentially "mom", but we all screw our kids up in one way or another. I figure they can spend their adult lives doing whatever they want. And if the worst thing that happens to them is that they have to care for their younger siblings, they are doing pretty well, really. If you don't believe me, let me tell you a story about a kid who has a hard time opening her eyes all the way due to undeveloped muscles in her eyelids from being kept in the corner of a dark trailer for the first year of life.
I actually do understand all of the above arguments and don't disagree with those who stand on them. But none of those reasons speak to me. But I think I know the one that does.
Michelle is not a young woman. Difficulties associated with pregnancy and childbirth do not decrease as one gets older. The last Duggar pregnancy was fraught with complications and resulted in the birth of a micro-preemie. Mom and baby both survived and are doing well, but it was touch-and-go for quite a while. Does this mean she doesn't have a right to have more kids? No. I had a preemie and a complicated pregnancy and chose to have another child . AFTER consulting with multiple health professionals. Do I know that Michelle hasn't gotten the go ahead from her doctor and been told there is a 0% chance that she will have another complicated pregnancy? No, I don't know that for sure. But I do know that I wouldn't bet the farm on the odds of that happening.
Now to the real issue for me...Michelle and her husband have both said publicly that they will have as many kids "as God sees fit" and that if she keeps getting pregnant, it is God's will.
Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Back up the hockey-team-converted-to-Duggar-family-transport-vehicle bus. If God lets you get pregnant again it is his will to risk your own life and the life of a child and possibly leave your other 19 children motherless? Isn't that kind of like the people who choose not to treat their children for cancer because if it is God's will for them to live, they will live without medical intervention? I may have missed the boat, but it seems to me there was something in that there Bible about free will and choosing to go down one path or the other. Last time I checked, the ability or desire to do something didn't necessarily make it a slam dunk in the what-would-Jesus-do "right" game.
So is it God's will for the Duggars to have 20 kids? Maybe. I missed the memo directly from God on that subject evidently. But the memo I did see (in the form of the most printed book of all time) is that as humans we are given free will and are indeed fallible. We don't always choose the right path, even when we think we are doing God's will. We are sinful. We are broken. We are selfish.
I can't help but wonder if maybe Michelle and Jim Bob aren't just a little swayed by what THEY desire rather than determining what it is that GOD desires. Do I have any clue (much less hard evidence) what it is that God desires for the Duggars as far as their family size goes? Ummmmm, no. But I am pretty sure no one else does either. Maybe they are just a little bit selfish - kind of like the rest of us mere mortals. And doesn't that leave open the possibility that they are making ill-informed decisions and then justifying them in a way that is hard to argue with (i.e. God's will) since no one knows that for sure?
Of course I don't know any of this for sure. But, as always, I have an opinion. That I am definitely not afraid to share. After all, if I can share it, it must be God's will that I blog about it all I want to, right? Argue with that one, people.
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