that make me happy. After my last post (in which I apparently sounded like I was headed for the nearest tall bridge or building based on the number of concerned calls and messages I received), I thought I would get back to blogging about the more mundane parts of my life...
Here are some of the "little things" that have put a smile on may face in the last week or so...
* Finding a show that hubby and I can watch together without one of us wanting to claw our eyeballs out. That actually brings our together-TV-show total up to 3.
* Some snow to make things look clean and white and new. Until all the cars roll through it and the dog pees in it, anyway.
* A new USB blood glucose meter that plugs right in and creates all kinds of fancy graphs and tables. If I have to be diabetic, I should at least have cool gadgets, right? As an extra added bonus, it was FREE because it was on sale and I had a coupon - now I can spend that $74.99 on something fabulous like test strips to go with it.
* Coffee. I had a cup of coffee the other day for the first time in a month or so. Yum.
* Aaron and Grant in their matching "wife-beater" tank t-shirts. I am not sure how I feel about Grant walking around actually referring to his shirt as a wife-beater, but he looked pretty cute.
* A couple of new non-stick skillets. I can even "legally" put these in the dishwasher because they actually said "dishwasher safe" on the box.
* Bryn "forgetting" to give me her report card for three days and then opening it and finding out that she truly did forget - her grades were great.
* My sparkly red fingernail polish. I will go more subdued this next time, but I love that after almost 3 weeks, the gel polish has just shown its first sign of wear and tear.
*Grant signing his goodnight songs with me - all out of tune and garbled, just like I sing them!
I am so thankful for so many big things (a wonderful husband, great kids, fabulous friends and family), but sometimes it's the little things that really remind me that LIFE IS GOOD!
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Saturday, January 1, 2011
I guess it depends on how you look at it
It has taken me some time to get myself together on this post. Christmas has come and gone and I didn't blog about it. The kids have done some funny things and I haven't blogged about them. I have been distracted. I got some news in late November that has changed my life as I know it. It was either an early Christmas present to my me for my health or the most devastating health news I have ever received. I guess it depends on how you look at it.
I have Type 2 diabetes. It has changed virtually everything about my life. I poke my fingers and check my blood sugar a million times a day, I obsess about what I eat, I cry, I worry about every ache and pain, my house is a wreck because I can't get my life back to "normal" and I worry I am going to die tomorrow and leave my husband and my kids. I often feel like I am going crazy, I am not sleeping well, I am experiencing what are probably medication side effects and I spend a lot of time feeling nauseated and tired. I blame myself for getting fat and out of shape (although I have learned that winning the genetic lottery is also a requirement for Type 2 diabetes because not all fat people get Type 2 and not all Type 2s are fat).
But before you think I am going to completely lose it before tomorrow, there are some positives. This diagnosis could very well allow me to live a longer and healthier life than I would have otherwise as it will force me to pay closer attention to my health and my habits. I have had tons of tests that have come back OK - my heart seems OK, my liver and kidneys seem fine - and I am eating well and exercising and am more in tune with what affects my body. I have lost 12 pounds this month, I have stretches where I feel pretty good for hours at a time, I have met some supportive and inspiring people on-line, I have become something of an expert on many things diabetes and I have a new appreciation for the life I do have and all of the good things in it.
I will never be "cured" but in 2011 I hope to learn how to balance my new chronic illness with my real life. I know there will be good days and bad days, I know that there will be times where I can't function and leave Aaron holding the bag and I know I will have setbacks. I also know that every cloud has a silver lining - sometimes it is just a little harder to find than others. But I will be looking hard because this is my new life and I don't plan to let diabetes get the best of it. So I hope to laugh a little harder, play a little more, love like it can all be lost in an instant and worry a lot less. I hope to learn to live in a way that I haven't always before - finding joy in all the moments and focusing on the real blessings in my life.
Diabetes. Blessing or curse? I guess it depends on how you look at it.
I have Type 2 diabetes. It has changed virtually everything about my life. I poke my fingers and check my blood sugar a million times a day, I obsess about what I eat, I cry, I worry about every ache and pain, my house is a wreck because I can't get my life back to "normal" and I worry I am going to die tomorrow and leave my husband and my kids. I often feel like I am going crazy, I am not sleeping well, I am experiencing what are probably medication side effects and I spend a lot of time feeling nauseated and tired. I blame myself for getting fat and out of shape (although I have learned that winning the genetic lottery is also a requirement for Type 2 diabetes because not all fat people get Type 2 and not all Type 2s are fat).
But before you think I am going to completely lose it before tomorrow, there are some positives. This diagnosis could very well allow me to live a longer and healthier life than I would have otherwise as it will force me to pay closer attention to my health and my habits. I have had tons of tests that have come back OK - my heart seems OK, my liver and kidneys seem fine - and I am eating well and exercising and am more in tune with what affects my body. I have lost 12 pounds this month, I have stretches where I feel pretty good for hours at a time, I have met some supportive and inspiring people on-line, I have become something of an expert on many things diabetes and I have a new appreciation for the life I do have and all of the good things in it.
I will never be "cured" but in 2011 I hope to learn how to balance my new chronic illness with my real life. I know there will be good days and bad days, I know that there will be times where I can't function and leave Aaron holding the bag and I know I will have setbacks. I also know that every cloud has a silver lining - sometimes it is just a little harder to find than others. But I will be looking hard because this is my new life and I don't plan to let diabetes get the best of it. So I hope to laugh a little harder, play a little more, love like it can all be lost in an instant and worry a lot less. I hope to learn to live in a way that I haven't always before - finding joy in all the moments and focusing on the real blessings in my life.
Diabetes. Blessing or curse? I guess it depends on how you look at it.
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